Can It Be Harder For Someone To Change Their Story If They Experienced Childhood Trauma?

When it comes to someone’s ‘story’, this can relate to how they see themselves, what they believe they are capable of and what they believe they are here for. Now, it could be said that the ideal will be for each of these elements to be empowering.

As if someone sees themselves in a positive way, believes that they are capable and are here for an important reason, their life is more likely to be fulfilling than if this wasn’t the case. Ultimately, they will be able to live a life that is worth living.

Back To Reality

However, there is the chance that one won’t be able to relate to this and, as a result, will live a life that is anything but fulfilling. In general, it could be as though they are just going through the motions.

If they were to think about their life, along with what their life has been like for many years, they could think about how their time on this earth is something that they have to endure, not enjoy. Quite simply, they are not going to see life as a gift.

A Big Step

Still, while their life won’t be very fulfilling, at least they will have been able to see what is going on. They will have been able to take a step back and to reflect on what is taking place inside them.

This will give them the chance to do something about what is going on; whereas if they didn’t have this level of awareness, this wouldn’t be an option. Instead, they would be completely enslaved by their story, seeing it as just how life is.

Getting Clear

If they were to take a closer look at their story and to write down what comes to mind, they could list some, if not all, of the following things:

• That they are worthless

• That they are powerless

• That they have no control

• That they are unlovable

• That is it not safe for them to be here

• That they don’t deserve to be here

• That they are incapable

• That they are useless

• That they have no reason for being here

• That they are here to please others

• That they are here to meet other people’s needs

Weighed Down

Through having a story like this, regardless of whether or not they can only relate to all of these points, is not going to allow them to truly fly on this earth. Like a bird that has had its wings clipped, they will be a shadow of the person that they could be.

The part of them that can see that this is not the truth of who they are could often be outmuscled by the part, of parts, of them that are completely caught up in this story. This means that at times they will be able to see that this is not who they are, whilst at other times this won’t take place.

Drawing the Line

When it comes to moving forward, one approach would be for them to change what is taking place in their mind, to change their thoughts, and to alter their behaviour. Through the power of their thoughts and behaviour, they will gradually be able to change their story.

This is because they will have thoughts and behave in a way that supports a more empowering story. As the weeks and months go by, then, they could start to be grateful for being given the gift of life.

Another Approach

Then again, this approach might not work, and, even if it does work, it might only last for a short period of time. What this can illustrate is that it is not just what is taking place in their mind and their behaviour that is keeping their story alive; it is also what is taking place in their body.

In this part of their being, they could be carrying a lot of emotional pain and trauma, and both of these things, through influencing their internal and external world, will support their story and thereby, keep it alive. At this point, one may wonder why they would be carrying all this baggage in their body.

Way Back

During their early years, they may have been abused and/or neglected on a weekly, if not daily, basis. In addition to what they went through, there would have been the meaning that their undeveloped brain made out of what took place.

This would have been a time when they were egocentric, meaning that what would place would have been taken personally. In reality, what took place had nothing to do with them or their value as a human being.

The Foundations were laid

With this in mind, the story that they have in place now that they are adult will largely be a reflection of the meaning that their undeveloped brain made out of what took place when they were very small. So, as real as this story may appear to be to their ego-mind, it is a story that is built on sand.


The trouble is that even though it is not the truth, as this story is what is familiar, their ego-mind will associate it as what is safe. To this part of them, holding onto this story, regardless of how destructive it is, will be perceived as essential to one’s survival – letting it go will be seen as something that will cause them to die.


For one to change their story, they will need to work through the baggage that is held in their body. Through doing this, the energy that is keeping their old story alive will start to subside and they will be able to create a new story.

This is something that can take place with the assistance of a therapist or healer.

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