After living a life that is anything but fulfilling for a number of years, someone could come to the conclusion that they need to do something about it. Perhaps something that they have seen on TV or read online has played a part in this.
For quite some time, they might have got a sense that something needs to be done, and, after coming across something, it allowed them to take the first step. Now, if they were to think about what it is that they need to change, at least one area of their life could come to mind.
The Main One
They could think about how their view of themselves is not very helpful or empowering, with this being something that is holding them back. If they were to reflect on how long they have seen themselves in a negative light, they might see that they have more or less always seen themselves in this way.
Through reaching out, then, they might come to conclude that they need to look into what it is that they believe. The reason for this is that they may have been told that it is their irrational beliefs that are the problem.
After this, one could end up making a list of what their irrational beliefs are. If this was to take place, they could find that they have some, if not all, of the following:
• They believe that they are worthless
• They believe that they are not enough
• They believe that they are unworthy
• They believe that they are nothing
• They believe that they are defective
• They believe that they are unlovable
Drawing the Line
Each of these beliefs will have no basis in reality, which is why they will be seen as ‘irrational’. With this in mind, the next stage will be for them to remove these beliefs and to replace them with rational beliefs.
There is the chance that one has also learned that their beliefs will be playing a part in the thoughts that they have. Therefore, not only will changing these beliefs allow them to see themselves differently, it will also allow them to experience different thoughts.
When it comes to removing these beliefs, they will have already taken the first step – this would have taken place when they become clear about what some of their irrational beliefs were. The second step will be for them to talk to themselves in a more positive way.
Through consciously changing their inner dialogue, and behaving differently, they will gradually be able to supplant these old beliefs. This, of course, won’t take place overnight; it will require patience and persistence.
As to why they would have these irrational beliefs, it could be said that it is the result of what they have experienced as an adult and what took place during their early years. Still, what took place will be over and there will be no need for them to focus on the past.
If they were to focus on the past, they would just be wasting their precocious time and energy. Focusing on what happened could also end up putting them in a negative state, something that is not going to serve them.
A Temporary Solution
Purely changing their beliefs may allow then to gradually change their life; then again, it might only work for a short while, or it might not work at all. If it does work, it might only work because this approach will allow them to change what is taking place at a mental level, repressing how they truly feel in the process.
This can be hard for someone to accept, especially if they have come to believe that their thoughts create their feelings. As widespread as this view is, it is nothing more than a half-truth.
Going Deeper, Way Deeper
Taking this into account, what if there was a time when these beliefs were an accurate reflection of how they were being treated? This would mean that although they are irrational now, there would have been a time when they were rational.
Along with the conclusions that their mind made, there would have been how they felt. The beliefs that they carry are going to be one part, the other part will be all of the ‘negative’ feelings that they carry.
There is a strong chance that this will relate to what took place when they were very small. Thus, this would have probably been a stage of their life when their thinking brain was in an undeveloped state and they were fully in touch with their emotional self.
In other words, this stage of their life would have had a massive effect on their emotional body/self. As an adult, they, along with many of their fellow human beings, could see themselves as just having a physical body and a mental self but they will also have an emotional body/self, and this part, a part that is far stronger than their mental self, will continue to affect how they see themselves and their life.
Getting To the Root
The emotional pain that they carry from this stage of their life will need to be faced and worked through. Through grieving their unmet childhood needs, they are likely to find that their ‘irrational’ beliefs will start to fall away.
Another way of looking at this would be to say that one will be getting in touch with what is taking place in their unconscious mind. This will allow them to deal with their issues at the root as opposed to trying to change the effects of what is held in this part of their being.
If one can relate to this, and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided with the assistance of a therapist or healer.